


Five Years Later

by Masterless



Category: Druck | SKAM (Germany)
Genre: Cooking, Emotions, M/M, TW: Suicide Mention, University, because they suck, lots of cooking, no alternative universe, supportive boys in love, tw: depression mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-19
Updated: 2019-05-19
Packaged: 2020-03-08 05:15:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18887899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Masterless/pseuds/Masterless
Summary: It did surprise David, three years ago, however, when he found three university catalogs in the mailbox to Matteo’s apartment. They were all addressed to Matteo.





	Five Years Later

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Tired, Hungry, and Loving You](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18875233) by [Sourpurple](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sourpurple/pseuds/Sourpurple). 



If someone had told David five years ago that he would eventually have a boyfriend and a large group of friends who accepted him unconditionally, who embraced every aspect of him, he could have laughed in their face, then gone home and cried in the privacy of his own bed. The idea that he could be accepted as who we was, after the reactions of his parents and so called friends and everyone else at school? It was so far fetched to him. But now? Four years after meeting Matteo and all of his friends, David accepted it wholeheartedly. 

The start to their relationship was rocky, and it hadn’t been an easy three years, but David loved every step of the way, even if he loved some steps more than others. He hated coming out to Matteo, hated the chance that he’d leave. He loved when he got that phone call from Matteo, the other boys voice a soothing balm over chafing nerves. He hated being outed, feeling like he was drowning in the middle of the stairs, everyone’s eyes on him. He loved how Matteo came for him, screamed at him in the empty pool, kissed him like nothing could change his love. He hated it when he saw Matteo slip deeper and deeper into his own head, hated the knife that dug into his soft boys wrists one cold November night. He loved it when he picked Matteo up at the clinic four weeks later, bottle of medication in hand, smiling a little brighter, eyes a little clearer, just in time for Christmas. David loved the way that everyone had come together to support him, the way everyone had come together to support Matteo. He loved the late morning kisses, the soft hands on his stomach tracing the very edge of his binder, the pale blue eyes that were always filled with so much love when they were directed at David, no matter how far into his own head Matteo was. 

It did surprise David, three years ago, however, when he found three university catalogues in the mailbox to Matteo’s apartment. They were all addressed to Matteo. David had sort of gotten used to the idea of Matteo not going to university, of the blond working while David was in classes, spending the nights curled together in their room, watching something new on Netflix. They’d managed to get through all of  _ Umbrella Academy _ in three nights, though they’d both been very tired the next few days. He had moved in with Matteo a few months after they’d officially started dating, and Laura had moved in, too, when Mia moved out. Though, David suspected that Laura was spending more time in Linn’s room than her own. The two had grown very close, and David wouldn’t be surprised if they told everyone they were together, but he was giving his sister time.

The university catalogs surprised him so much because Matteo hadn’t even mentioned continuing his education. He seemed content with working and spending time with David and his friends. David didn’t feel insecure about it, he knew that even if Matteo did go to college, he wouldn’t suddenly stop loving him, but he did feel a little strange. He felt like maybe Matteo didn’t trust him with this big decision, but he didn’t want to jump to conclusions. 

When he got up to the flat, he was greeted by the sweet smell of cooking apples, and his eyes fluttered closed, his mouth watering. There was soft music filtering through the air, and he recognized it as the soundtrack from  _ Call Me by Your Name _ . David had gotten Matteo to watch it, expecting him to roll his eyes the whole way through, but he was pleasantly surprised when he turned to look at Matteo after the movie was over to find tears in his eyes. Matteo had taken an interest in all of the artsy gay movies he could get his hands on, and David was all too happy to watch them, too. They’d watched  _ Love, Simon _ ,  _ Pride,  _ and  _ The Way He Looks _ all in one night before David said he couldn’t take any more sappy movies. He had loved all of them, of course, but it was a lot of emotions in one night. Matteo had agreed, so they turned off his laptop and went to bed, but they kept watching artsy movies a few times a week, and Matteo was building an impressive collection of movies. Jonas had poked fun at him for getting  _ Lady Bird _ , but after Matteo had forced the boys to watch it, he’d dropped the teasing of Matteo’s movies. 

David opened his eyes when he heard a throat clear, and found himself looking at Matteo, his sweater sleeves pushed up to his elbows, his hands and wrists covered in flour and dough. David smiled at him, his insides melting at the sight of his boyfriend happy.

“Na?” Matteo said.

“Hi,” David responded, stepping closer to give him a kiss. “You got some mail.”

Matteo took, his brow furrowing slightly. “Oh. These.”

“Yeah, those.” David bit his lip before sighing and letting his own nerves get the better of him. “Why didn’t you tell me you were thinking of going to college?”

“Because I didn’t think it was a big idea.” Matteo shrugged and put them down on the key table in the hall. “I didn’t really think that… I’d even want to go when I got them, I just… feel kind of stuck.” He started to unconsciously rub at the scars on his wrists, both a pale pink, like he always did when he got nervous. “Everyone around me is moving on and I’m… not.”

David cupped Matteo’s face in his hands, running his thumbs over his cheeks. “You’re not stuck. You have a job, you have a life. Just because they went to university right off the bat doesn’t mean they know better. You needed to take some time, and that’s fine.”

Matteo leaned forward to rest their foreheads together, smiling slightly. “I know, I just… don’t feel like that all the time. It hurts, sometimes, when I ask if the boys want to hang out and they all say they can’t because they’re hanging out with school friends, or because they have to study, or because they have to work. I don’t hate them for it, but…”

“You miss them.”

“I miss how easy things were,” Matteo whispered, tears gathering in his eyes. “I knew what I was doing in school, I feel like everything is up in the air right now, everything is happening and I don’t know how to make it all stop swirling, and-”

“Matteo,” David cut in. “Matteo, breathe with me.” 

He could feel the other boy starting to stumble into a panic attack, and he didn’t want to see that again. It made him sound selfish, not wanting to deal with Matteo’s panic attacks, but they scared him. Matteo didn’t have panic attacks like David did. The first time David saw Matteo having a panic attack, he just thought he was frustrated. He was red in the face and everything was making him scowl, his movements jittery. He kept messing up his hair, scratching at his arms with blunted nails. It wasn’t until Matteo left the room that David realised something was wrong. They’d been in the living room together, David studying, Matteo just spending the time with him, and David had no idea what set him off. But when David followed, and Matteo was pacing their room, headphones clamped to his head in shaking hands, crying, a lit blunt hanging from his lips, he knew that something was going on, and it wasn’t good. David knew that it took Matteo a long while to feel better, and he was self destructive in those times of recovery. His wrists bore the marks of history, and he never wanted to see him get that low again.

“Breathe with me,” David whispered, feeling Matteo melt against him. “There, that’s better?”

“Ja.” Matteo jumped as an alarm sounded behind them. “Shit!”

“What?” David asked, watching as Matteo ran back into the kitchen, pulling on an oven mitt and opening the oven. The air suddenly smelled like sugar and pastry and apples, and David almost swooned. “What are those?”

“ _ Apple and pear turnovers _ ,” Matteo said, pronouncing the english slightly wrong, but David found it endearing. “I found the recipe online and decided to try it.”

When they’d cooled enough to eat, David had stuffed his face with them. After the first bite, David was hooked and he couldn’t tear himself away from them. Matteo made twelve turnovers, but between the two of them, there were only five left when Hans, Linn, and Laura got him. Matteo was beyond happy that David had liked the food, and laughed when David complained about how he was going to get fat if Matteo kept on like this.

Eventually, a few nights later, Matteo looked at the university catalogs that David had brought in, passing straight over one for an engineering school that he knew he was never going to. One, though, caught his attention, but he put it to the side because it was in Switzerland. The last one was interesting, but it wasn’t really what Matteo wanted to do. He didn’t really know what he wanted to do, but he didn’t want a degree that he can’t do anything with. He liked science, but he didn’t want to be a scientist. He liked writing, but he didn’t want to be a writer. He liked math, but he didn’t want to be a mathematician. His eyes kept wandering to the second pamphlet, the one he’d put aside, and David rolled his eyes after a while, picked it up, and put it back into Matteo’s hands.

“It doesn’t matter that it’s in Switzerland, we can make it work,” David said. “Didn’t you mother say she wanted to help you pay for university? And your father said he did, too, because he feels guilty about being so absent in your life for the past?”

Matteo shrugged. “Ja, but… it’s culinary school, David, and I have no experience.”

“Uh… but you cook all the time? And you took culinary classes over the summer, and you have a passion for it,” David said, playfully pushing Matteo. “You’ll be a great student there, and we can make it work.”

Smiling slightly, excitedly, Matteo looked down at the pamphlet again. “You think so?”

“I think so.”

 

*

 

It was almost two months later when David opened their letter box on his way up from work and found an envelope addressed to Matteo, sent all the way from Switzerland.  _ All the way _ , David thought with a snort.  _ Switzerland isn’t that far away _ . He walked up the stairs, the envelope seeming to grow heavier as he went. He wanted Matteo to get in, he did, he knew it would make him so happy, and Matteo really needed some happiness right now. His father was getting remarried, and his fiancé was pregnant, and it was too much for Matteo. David knew that an acceptance letter would make his boyfriend so exceptionally happy, but… Le Bouveret was in Switzerland… it was a ten hour drive away… He’d never been away from Matteo for more than a few days since the beginning of their relationship, even when he’d run away, that was less than a week. He was going to miss him, but… they’d make it work.

Matteo was in the kitchen when David unlocked the door, stress cooking. The air smelled of chicken and garlic, and David’s stomach growled. He hadn’t eaten all day, not since Matteo had made them crepes with chocolate and strawberries for breakfast, and this was almost torture to come back to. He dropped his bag by the door and toed off his shoes before walking into the kitchen. Matteo was cleaning up the counters, keeping an eye on the two covered frying pans on the stove top. There was a tall pot on there as well, which was steaming slightly from under the lid, a bubbling sound coming from inside.

“What are you making?” David asked.

“Dinner,” Matteo answered shortly, but he immediately looked over apologetically, melting into David’s arms when he wrapped them around the other boy. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” David said. “You need to talk about anything?”

“My dad asked me if I wanted to be his best man,” Matteo whispered. “I feel weird about it, though, because I don’t know anyone else. I don’t even know the woman he’s about to marry. And I really don’t want to go to Italy.”

“No?” David pulled away slightly, a little worried about the sizzling sound coming from the tall pot on the stove. “I would’ve thought you’d like to go, seeing as you’re half Italian.”

Matteo rolled his eyes playfully. “Ja, I would, but not for his wedding.”

David nodded, but before he could say anything, there was a loud sizzle and a pop, and Matteo jerked from his embrace to turn the heat down under the pot and pull off the lid.

“What is that?” David asked.

“I’m boiling potatoes to make mash,” Matteo answered, grabbing a kitchen towel to pull the pot from the stove. He walked over the sink, placing the lip back on the pot, slightly off center, and drained the boiling water. David watched, impressed at Matteo’s ability to not be freaked out by the heat. “I started making them with nothing else in mind, but then I saw that you’d bought chicken, so I looked up a recipe for chicken, and I think you’ll like this one.”

“I like pretty much everything you make, Matteo,” David chuckled. 

David watched as Matteo sliced butter and poured a splash of milk into the potatoes and started to mash. The muscles on his upper arms were starting to be more slightly more defined because of the amount of lifting and moving about he was doing at work and in the kitchen, and David liked to see it. He didn’t, however, like to see the bandages stuck there.

“What happened?” David asked, tapping Matteo’s upper arm slightly.

“Nothing,” Matteo said, blowing hair out of his eyes.

“Matteo.”

With a sigh, Matteo set down the masher and looked down to his feet. “I splashed myself with hot oil. I didn’t want you to know because it was a stupid mistake I made.”

“As long as you’re not… doing it on purpose, getting hurt it part of life.” David smiled when Matteo looked up at him shyly. “I’ll keep mashing, you check the other stuff.”

Matteo went to check on his pans, giving one of them a final stir before grabbing plates from the cabinet above the sink. He spooned heaped scoops of mash onto both plates, and David watched as he revealed the contents of each pan. One was chicken, David could see, and it smelled heavenly. The next had a slowly simmering sauce in it, thick and slightly yellow, with minced garlic and shallots. Matteo picked up one of the pieces of chicken with the spatula and gently placed it on the mashed potatoes, followed by a drizzle of the sauce. He handed the plate to David, who took it with hunger in his eyes and his stomach. Matteo plated the second chicken breast and covered it in sauce before joining David at the table.

“So, Mr. Florenzi,” David said, smiling. “What have you prepared for us today?”

“Pan-seared chicken breast in a white wine and broth reduction sauce,” Matteo said with a pleased grin. “Served over mashed potatoes, and with,” Matteo stood and went to the fridge opening it and pulling out a bottle of white wine before resuming his seat, “a nice, dry white wine.”

“Have we become the wine gays?” David asked.

“Of course.” Matteo chuckled. “We’re becoming the bougie ones in the group, even if we still dress like we do.”

“There is nothing wrong with eating fine cuisine in sweatpants,” David said. “This is delicious, by the way.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” David leaned over to give him a kiss, chuckling when Matteo scrunched his nose when he pulled away. “What?”

“You taste like garlic.”

“Well, that’s your fault.”

Matteo smiled again, settling into the meal, sighing happily when he took his first mouthful. He really did love cooking, David knew, it always made him feel better.

“Oh, shit!” David said, standing quickly, quick enough to knock over the stool he was sitting on, and rushing into the hall, where he’d left all of his things.

“David?”

“You got a letter!” David shouted. “From the school!”

“What?”

There was another clatter as Matteo followed David out of the kitchen. They met in the doorway, David holding out the envelope, Matteo reaching for it with shaking hands. He ripped it open and read the letter, his face devoid of emotion as his eyes flicked from line to line. He took a deep breath in and lowered his arms, stepping closer to David, into his arms, and holding him close.

“Matteo?”

“I got in.”

“You got in?” David heart was pounding in his chest, his arms tight around Matteo’s shoulders, Matteo shaking against his chest.

“I got in.”

“You got in!”

Matteo was trembling from head to toe, and he was soon crying, his face buried in David’s neck, but he was happy. David could feel it in the breath on his skin, the rumbling in Matteo’s chest that was slowly bubbling into a laugh. Matteo pulled away from him, his hands still on David’s waist, and started hopping up and down on the balls of his feet, trying to contain his joy.

 

*

 

The next few months were filled with building momentum, an air of waiting expanding until David felt like he couldn’t breathe with it. He was happy for Matteo, really, he was, but it was tinged with a loneliness that would wrap its way around his heart and warp his thoughts until he would have to leave whatever he was doing for a few moments to cry. He was surprised at how much he cried over the passed few weeks, knowing it got harder to cry the longer he was on T. He knew that Matteo was picking up on it, too, but he didn’t want to say anything about it, knowing it would uset Matteo, probably to the point of him not leaving. And David wouldn’t be able to deal with himself if he was the reason Matteo didn’t go. It was the first time he’d seen Matteo be excited, really excited, about something.

The night before Matteo was set to leave, bags all packed and stacked at the foot of their bed, David finally broke down in front of Matteo. They were laying in bed, chests still rising in post-sex bliss, David’s chest tight from his sadness and his binder. He really had to stop wearing when they had sex, it wasn’t healthy, but he didn’t feel right without it. Matteo was drifting to sleep, David could hear it, when David let out a trapped sob.

“David?” Matteo asked, sitting up and immediately cupping his face. “David, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” David whispered, hiccuping another sob before curling into Matteo’s chest. “I’m g-going to m-miss you.”

Matteo was quiet for a moment, holding him tighter. “I’ll miss you, too. But we’ll talk every day, and Skype, and FaceTime. Ja?”

“Ja…” David could feel the tension in Matteo’s body. “I’m s-sorry…”

“Nein,” Matteo reassured. “I just… was worried you weren’t going to miss me as much as I missed you. With your school friends and all.”

“How could I not miss you?” David placed a kiss on Matteo’s collar bone. “You’re my boyfriend, I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

 

*

 

The next three years were difficult, to say the least, but it was worth it to see Matteo shine and grow. David realised, despite the year off that Matteo took, that they were going to graduate at the same time. The culinary school that Matteo was going to was only a three year program, and even though Matteo had made the decision, halfway through his second year, to get his masters, or Swiss Grand Diploma, he was still graduating with a bachelor's degree a week before David. The summers were great, though a little shorter than David wanted, because Matteo wanted to show off his new skills every time he was home.

“And what is this, Chef Florenzi?” Jonas asked one night, visiting with the boys. “Some kind of masterpiece?”

“Herb crusted halibut,” Matteo said, flicking bread crumbs at him.

“Herb crusted what?” Abdi repeated.

“Halibut.”

“It’s fish,” David said, receiving an approving kiss from a passing Matteo. “It’s very good, he made it for me when I went to visit him once.”

“Fish?” Carlos repeated. “I don’t know if I like fish.”

“You will,” David chuckled. “Honestly, I can’t say I liked fish before I tried this, and now I can’t stop thinking about it.”

When the meal was served, over a bed of wild ride, Jonas tucked in right away, Abdi was slightly hesitant, and Carlos looked like he was waiting for everyone else to try it. When Jonas groaned with pleasure and Abdi nodded his head in agreement, Carlos took a tentative nibble, his eyes widening.

“Told you,” David said. “All it takes is a good cook, and fish can be really good.”

“Wow,” Abdi said, after the meal. “That was amazing.”

“It was so good!” Carlos said. “Man, you have to make that again.”

“I want more,” Jonas said. “Is there any more?”

“Nein,” Matteo said. “Well, there is, but it’s for Hans, Linn, and Laura.” 

Jonas groaned again, frustrated. “But it’s so good!”

The night ended with all of them getting blind drunk, as they usually did, but not before they all nearly died from food related bliss when Matteo produced the dessert.

“You made this?” Abdi asked.

“Ja,” Matteo said, blushing. “It’s not as hard as it looks, the hardest part was poaching the pears. If it’s too hot, then the pears just disintegrate, if it’s too cold, they don’t poach all the way through.”

“So what is this?” Jonas asked. “Because it looks great.”

“It’s a layered ginger cake with wine poached pears and cream cheese frosting.” Matteo blushed harder at the sounds his friends were making, all of them complementary and nice, just slightly embarrassing. 

 

*

 

When Matteo called him in the middle of the day, when he knew that David was working, David knew something was up. He stepped into the bathroom, locked the door behind him, and picked up the phone.

“Hallo?”

“David,” Matteo said, sounding out of breath and slightly scared.

“Matteo, what’s wrong?” David asked.

“Nothing, I… David, I’m graduating at the end of the week.”

“I know, baby, and you’ve got a job lined up, you’ll be fine.” It was a good fucking job, too, a chef in one of the highest recommended restaurants in Berlin. It paid better than any of the jobs David had been offered, and he was ecstatic that Matteo was getting such a well paying job. They could move out together, get a real TV. “You’re going to be fine, baby.”

“David.”

“Ja?”

“They’ve asked me to give a speech at graduation.”

“What?” David almost didn’t believe him.”

“I’ve got the highest marks out of everyone in my year, they’re asking me to give a speech to everyone about like… life and making sure that we do good and all that.”

“That’s incredible!” David smiled, even though he knew Matteo couldn’t see him. “Matteo, I’m so proud of you!”

There was a knock on the bathroom door.

“I don’t know what to say.”

“You’ll think of something, I promise.” David turned to face to door. “Baby, I’ve got to go, I’m at work.”

“Shit, right, sorry.” Matteo gave a small but hysterical laugh. “I’ll call you tonight, ja?”

“Ja.”

 

*

 

Three years, top surgery, two weddings (Carlos and Kiki, and Jonas and Hanna), and thousands of phone calls later, David was sat at Matteo’s graduation. David hadn’t gotten to hear the speech that Matteo had written until the day of the ceremony. It was hot and sunny and they were outside, but David was happy to be there with all of their friends. Everyone, even Mia and Alex, were there to see Matteo speak. Even Matteo’s parents were there, his father beaming with pride, his mother already in tears. Matteo was sitting up on stage with the rest of the speakers, nervously picking at his nails, probably sweating under his black robes, but still looking good, at least to David.

“He looks nervous,” Amira said, looking spotless and stunning as ever. “Have you heard his speech?”

“Nein,” David said.

“I have,” Jonas said, smiling. “You’ll love it.”

David was about to ask more when the music started, and the first speaker got up. They all sort of blurred together until David heard Matteo’s name, and then time seemed to slow. Matteo stood from his seat, holding a folded piece of paper clenched tightly in his fist, walked to the podium, and stood, looking over his graduating class.

“Hello,” Matto began, searching. When his eyes locked with David’s, far off in the distance, he smiled. “As most of you probably know, I’m Matteo Florenzi. It’s been a long three years, hasn’t it?” He paused as the crowd of graduates cheered in agreement. “I don’t know how I would have done it without the support of all of our professors, my parents, my friends, and, most importantly, my boyfriend, David.” Another cheer went up through the crowd, this time with Matteo’s friends adding their voices, too. “Most of you probably won’t know, but I was a completely different person in high school. Though I still kind of look it, I was your typical stoner kid with no hope for a happy future. I was alone and depressed, and I honestly didn’t think I’d make it this far. I almost didn’t.” Another pause, where Matteo took a deep breath. “I can’t and kind of don’t want to remember all the times I stayed up at night, crying over a half risen souffle.” A rueful laugh rose. “But I made it. But we made it. We made it through to the end of our years, and I just want to say this. Thank you, to my parents, for always being behind me, even when you couldn’t see eye to eye. Thank you, to my friends, for sitting through meal after meal of attempts and failures. Thank you, to my professors, for pushing me to do my best. Thank you, to all of you, for being here for me, for each other, to make sure we all had a friend to lean on. And finally, thank you, to David, the man of my dreams, for being with me every step of the way, for loving me, for putting up with midnight calls about dropping out and skipping town to go to Detroit. Thank you, my love, for all that you do.” He took another deep breath, and David knew he was close to crying. “Now, everyone. Let’s graduate!”

Another cheer went up through the crowd, and Matteo returned to his seat behind the podium.

After another two hours of students getting their diplomas, David and his friends finally got to go see Matteo. He was standing with a group of people, diplomas in hand, all of them laughing about something, when he saw David.

“Hey!” David said, beaming at him, pulling him in for a tight hug.

“Hey,” Matteo returned, hugging him just as tightly. “Na?”

“Is this David?” a girl behind them said.

“Ja, this is David,” Matteo answered, turning around and almost showing him off. “This is my boyfriend.”

“Man,” she said, smiling back at David. “If you don’t marry him after that speech, you’re crazy.”

“Only if he’ll take me,” David said, blushing slightly under Matteo’s intense gaze.

“Of course I’ll take you.”

David blushed harder. “Are we getting married then?”

“We’re definitely getting married.”

**Author's Note:**

> These are the recipes to everything mentioned in the fic:  
> https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/220227/herb-crusted-halibut/?internalSource=streams&referringId=1044&referringContentType=Recipe%20Hub&clickId=st_trending_s  
> https://www.supergoldenbakes.com/ginger-layer-cake-poached-pears/  
> https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/76895/pan-seared-chicken-breasts-with-shallots/?internalSource=hub%20recipe&referringId=2264&referringContentType=Recipe%20Hub


End file.
